4-Step Process to Resolve Conflict Quickly

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let it go

The 3 Step Process To Let It Go

I’m a big believer that our experience of the world exists within conversations. Why? Because our lives are defined by our relationships, which are defined by conversations. I am certified in Conversational Intelligence, which studies the neuroscience of conversations as it relates to our personal lives and professional organizations. So naturally, you can expect an occasional nugget about transformative nature of conversations in my articles. 🙂 Now onto the art of letting go… This is a topic that comes up often, both with friends and clients. Holding on to “stuff” can be a serious source of voluntary misery. Today’s nugget… Cortisol, a neurotransmitter associated with the “fight or flight” response that tells the brain to shut down executive functions when a threat presents itself, has a shelf life of 26 hours in our system. That’s a long time. What’s also important to note is that

F@#$ Your New Year’s Resolutions

Happy New Year!! I’m writing this while my husband and I are sitting in the Taipei airport waiting for a connecting flight to Bali to attend a dear friend’s wedding. Almost there after 14 hours with some more to go so if you catch any typos it’s because I’m starting to see double. But jet lag or not, there’s no way I could skip the first post of this fabulous new year. The obvious subject would be resolutions, but I’m not going there. I trust you’ve had your fair share of “new year’s resolutions” content flood your feed and conversations and have already publicly or privately affirmed the shifts you’d like to make. That’s great. That’s all true for me too. But rather than dive into resolution talk – the “stuff” that we’re looking to start, change, create, or quit –

color inside the lines

Do You Color Inside The Lines?

It’s a delightful thing, coloring together with my kids at the dining room table. I marvel at how they silently swim in their own gigantic imaginations and translate their inner worlds onto paper.  They hate activity pages, only want “clear” printer paper, and in their wildly self-expressed ways create with complete abandon. Their intent, focus, and storylines are intense. Now me? I tend to doodle or color in one of their coloring books. What you read above is NOT my personal experience of creative expression. READ: I like to color inside the lines. Reflecting on this observation last week, I had an interesting thought: by insisting that I color inside the lines, have I been unintentionally keeping myself from taking big chances in life? This might seem like a stretch but hear me out. By drawing inside the lines, I follow the


The Gift Of Choice Is More Profound Than You Think

As we enter into the holiday season, particularly the reverent week of Thanksgiving, I can’t help but focus on gratitude.  Years past, I’ve reflected on gratitude as a “beingness,” or stance, rather than an activity.  This year, I narrow in and focus on one thing I’m thankful for – one thing us humans rarely stop to acknowledge… Choice. The fact that we are at choice is profound. We exercise basic choice – like preferences and how we live our lives – to significant choice: our perception, beliefs, interpretations, and essentially what’s possible for us and our life. This week I share a reflection my friend and colleague, Sina Mossayeb, captured in honor of choice – a gift we can all be incredibly thankful for. “Have you ever made a choice you know was high risk, certainly not accepted by the masses


Live As If Everything Is An Experiment

  What if everything in life was an experiment? Would you be more engaged? More brave? You’d bet you this… you’d live with conviction because you’d know you couldn’t fail. It feels like every week or so I pick up something new – a new insight, concept, or perception that moves me profoundly. And when it hits, it feels like “Me” talking to me, in some weird Bruce Almighty sort of way. For the big ones, I usually convert them into blog posts. For all the rest, I chew on them, make them a part of my regular internal dialogue, and put them into practice. This week, I share an idea that’s popped up over and over as a result of the current changes happening in my life – career transitions, a decision to move my family back to the

burning man

10 Reasons We Love Burning Man

Burning Man! It’s that time of year, folks! Burners have pulled out their dusty storage bins of tutus, goggles, and EL wire and are packing up their vehicles with water, fuzzy bikes, and sunblock. Sadly, my husband and I will be missing out on what the playa has to offer this year. Nevertheless, I intend to channel my inner child anyway. How? I’m having Aila, my 2-year-old daughter, dress me up everyday (think leg warmers, hard hat, and angel wings), I’ll randomly throw all-purpose flour around the house, and I’ll make a few bonfires in the backyard and burn stuff. I’ll let you know how it goes. So while my family creates our own version of Burning Man this week, I reflect on why I love this festival in the desert so darn much. Burning Man forces me back to my uninhibited, wildly

Why We Sabotage Our Own Success

We say we want to lose weight, yet the scale isn’t budging. We want to spend more time with our friends, however, there’s never enough time. We told ourselves that we’d feed our creativity and finally start those creative writing/tennis/salsa/piano lessons but haven’t pulled the trigger. Conflicting Commitments It’s a simple concept that clears up confusion on why we don’t end doing what we say we’re committed to doing. It seems pretty obvious, but we rarely work it all the way through. Knowing what’s going on in the background can help us understand why we behave in ways that undermine our own success. Is it laziness? Procrastination? Lack of willpower? No, not usually. Here’s why: everything we do – every thought, word, and action that arises from us – serves us in some way. There is nothing we do that